Euro FOBs

Folks,

I have delivered as promised, unlike the unscrupulous politicians on this very election day. Here's what I have gathered so far:

1) Gotta love those black leather jackets from the 80s - for some reason these guys are still in tune with McGuyver. Remember the bomber jackets with the shoulder pads? Maybe that's what they can only get in their war torn homeland.

2) Love those beat up Rabbits - no, I am not talking about the French delicacy, but the beat up 2 door frugal boxes wreaking havoc among the Silicon Valley highways. Just like their skin they often come dressed in white. And please, stop driving them like in the movie "Taxi".

3) Malnutritioned - I think it's their crave for nicotine that creates this image. For some reason these guys love to smoke, yet forget they spent their last buck on cigarettes instead of food. See "Trainspotting" for reference.

4) Blessed with Soccer - Hooligans should only stay in the island Empire of United Kingdom, but somehow this term has become more inclusive and now many of them have crossed the "pond" (aka Atlantic Ocean). Allow me to remind them this is good ol' US of A, where professional soccer earns you barely above minimum wage. Talking about Manchester United or Real Madrid in St Louis won't earn you a lot of friends.

5) Shower is a new concept - I don't think it's just the French who only showers perhaps once a week, but now somehow most of these clowns have adopted this concept. The ladies here don't appreciate the stench of perceived manliness. At least in France they use their bidet to wash their asses....

6) Don't shave - yes, using a razor is not a novel concept to mankind in the EU.

7) Skin-tight clothes - this is really the common theme among fobs from Europe or Asia, and the sight is something to behold when you are as toned as Calista Flockhart. Frankly I don't see how this can be comfortable, especially at the crotch area. Your country may like to control the birth rate, but here you don't need to shoot blanks.

8) Bush bashers without merit - I often hear how Americans are conservative, but they have yet had an answer to my rebuttal, "If your country is liberal, why is your president/prime minister and the senior staff all white?" Don't give me that crap you fake liberals.

More ideas to come :D